House Snob Cools Her Jets / by Dana Bergstrom

I used to be real opinionated about houses. I didn't like anything built after a specific time period. Didn't care for the design. I'd blather on about the lack of character and poor quality of materials.

One day a friend had had enough of my shit and called me a "House Snob". I stopped in my tracks and thought, "Wow. She's right. I AM super judgmental!"

So I became aware that I was being a jerk, but that still didn't stop me from thinking judgmental thoughts about housing style.

It wasn't until several years after this helpful incident that I realized I'd been clinging to my identity as a remodeler.

Once I let go of the need to identify as this particular and uptight role, my judgment of houses fell away. Loads of energy I was spending on being opinionated suddenly freed up!

Geez! I could've remodeled a whole other house with all of that extra energy!

Opinions are preferences taken to a judgmental extreme.


What external authority actually decides that one type of house is better than another? Architectural Digest? This Old House? Better Homes & Gardens?

I like old houses. Other people love new ones. Big fat, hairy deal.

Preferences make the world go round!

And any time I want to engage in any type of judgy comparison, whether it's about houses, art, lifestyle, clothing, or even comparing myself to how I think I'm supposed to be, I'm misidentified as something that I'm not.

Comparison is an ego device.

When I remember that I'm an infinite energy being who's temporarily appearing as a human, the desire to compare disappears.

Of course, it comes right back when I forget, but this is what happens to us humans.

All the livelong day!

Remember then forget.

Flow with ease then compare and judge.

Up then down.

It's all part of the DANCE of being human.

Right foot then left foot.

Choose the ego/inner bully then choose the love of the inner being.

It's not wrong to stop and then move again.

That's what dancing is all about!

And if I know one thing for sure, there is no wrong way to dance!