Thou Shalt Not Murder Your Husband / by Dana Bergstrom

You will get caught. And you will be sad. And you will miss him terribly. So don't kill him. Okay?

That's a bit of practical advice I like to offer my inner bully/ego to keep me out of jail. And it comes in handy on days, like today, when I've had too much Diet Coke.

Drinking excessive amounts of that delicious, amber, bubbly liquid automatically turns me into a rabid, fire-breathing cage fighter.

Pauly can immediately sense when I've had more than I can handle.

I wonder what gives it away. My constant yelling? Or maybe it's the growing fangs and wild foaming at the mouth.

"Dana, how many cans of crazy have you had today?"

Of course, that stupid, nosy question aggravates me even more.


I'm completely unreasonable when I'm hopped up on Diet Coke.

But whenever I'm not full of crazy juice, I've gotten pretty good at slowing down my reaction, stepping back and viewing situations from a much bigger picture.

This is how I currently like to see all unpleasant experiences: Whenever something's happening that I DON'T want, I've simply been presented with a fantastic opportunity to get clear about what I DO want. And then I can focus on that.

It also helps that I no longer perceive myself as a victim. Sure, that's my inner bully/ego's first response. Always.

If i haven't guzzled loads of the yummiest carbonated beverage on planet Earth, it's much easier to quickly catch my low vibe and recognize that I am 100% responsible for my experience.

Shifting out of that default ego-mode, I am happily energized. Believing that I can be a victim is so stinkin' exhausting. Knowing that I can completely alter my experience with my attitude is empowering. 

Since Pauly and I work together 24/7 we now offer each other plenty of opportunities to get clear on what we don't and do want.

It's good. And sometimes it's really messy.

We're both rapidly uncovering all kinds of hoohaw buried within our minds since the beginning of time -- much of it related to the belief in "original sin", which is that humans are inherently broken and separate from All That Is.

That single fearful idea breeds all kinds of false beliefs that automatically become barriers to being truly loving to ourselves and others.

Some days it feels like we're in a wild get-to-know-your-own-crap boot camp. There's so much garbage coming up to the surface to look at, forgive and release. Mental clutter clearing of ancient false beliefs can get ugly.

Yet, as a happy result, I have much greater clarity about what I want. And it has nothing to do with things that I once thought were so freekin' important. It has everything to do with remembering my true nature.

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all of the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.

A Course in Miracles T-16.IV.6.

As I let all limiting, lack-based beliefs rise to the surface and release them, I experience more and more of the love and peace that is innate within me.

Love is our inherent nature. This is what I really want to remember.


Drink too much Diet Coke, pick a fight and forget more often.

That's okay. I'm still learning. We all are.